5 simple ways to get off autopilot mode
Human traffic during London commute — autopilot activated to make it bearable.
I’d been driving for a good ten minutes in busy traffic – on autopilot. As a relatively new driver with two small kids in the back it freaked. me. out.
What had I actually been doing for the last 5 minutes? I probably wouldn’t even have noticed it if I wasn’t so new to driving.
Our brains are amazing! Once we’ve mastered something it becomes a routine. We don’t need to consciously think about it anymore. The subconscious takes care of it all. And other times, things are just damn unpleasant and there is nothing we can do about it, like getting crushed on the London underground at rush hour; so, zoning out can be a useful coping mechanism.
Let’s face it who hasn’t eaten in a rush; guzzling down food in order to get to the next thing on your to do list? Or found yourself on automatic mode when you’re drinking your coffee, or having a shower, or doing your groceries, or working out in the gym?
Maybe it’s OK because you’re doing some seriously good thinking during all those autopilot moments. Or you’re giving your conscious mind the break it deserves because doing everything consciously can be exhausting. But, maybe your mind is on autopilot mode too! And you’re just going over all those recurring (often completely unhelpful) thoughts that run through your head day in day out.
Whatever way it is — you will have missed the flavours and textures of your meal, the smell of your coffee, the feel of the water on your skin, the elderly lady in aisle 12 who needed help reaching something and the warnings your body was giving you that you were overdoing it and just about to strain your hamstring.
No real lasting harm done … but …what if the majority of your life seems to be on autopilot? You’re there but you’re not there. You’re so busy doing the do; the endless to do list, the work commitments, the family events, the domestic responsibilities; that you’re no longer really aware of what you’re doing or present to your life at all.
When whole days, weeks, months go by and you can’t really remember what you did, when you’re only ever in script mode with your nearest and dearest, or the work you used to find rewarding is something to just get through and when everything has become a monotonous routine from kissing your partner goodbye as you head off to work to going out with friends on a Friday night… you’re missing your actual life.
This way of living is completely joyless and unsatisfying; because it is UNLIVED! I actually quite like to drive, huge surprise to me! When I’m on autopilot I miss the joy of it.
There are two ways to approach this (apart from just completely ignoring it, which is always an option, but what a shame to miss your life or wait for something drastic to happen to wake you up out of zombie mode).
Feel and connect to the present. This can be done immediately. It can be very revealing and relieving and even enjoyable.
Explore why you’re numbing out and what it is you’re actually avoiding feeling. This is the soul searching, sometimes icky and hard work but life changing stuff.
Truth is you’re going to have to do both if you want to feel fully alive in your life, but for now, here are 5 ways to feel, connect and wake up to the present moment. Regardless of where you are and what you’re doing these micro-practices can have an immediate effect.
Come back to your body. How is your body feeling right now? Is there any tension, discomfort or pain? Are you able to access any other sensations in your body? No need to judge. I still find my body is quite numbed out even though I do somatic practices like conscious dance regularly.
Come back to your breath. How are you breathing right now? Are you taking short, sharp, shallow breaths up high in upper body or long, deep belly breaths? Again, you don’t need to change anything here. Just notice.
Come to your senses. What can you smell? Touch? Taste? Hear? See? Smell is a big one for me. I love to carry some essential oil with me and smell it to centre myself if I find I’m getting into my head. We say ‘come to our senses’ for a reason!
Attend to the task at hand. Just. One. Task. Even if it is as mundane as washing dishes, brushing teeth or commuting to work — can you stay with it and see what happens when you fully experience it? I often find the tasks that I resist the most are not uncomfortable or boring when I just give them my full attention.
Ask yourself the question: In this moment what am I choosing? As I cover in the post: Don’t find your purpose — live your intentions instead — I love this question posed by Deepak Chopra. It can help you choose while still allowing the here and now of life to happen. It can also reveal what it is you’re avoiding feeling. In this way it can be a stepping stone to a deeper exploration of why you choose autopilot mode.
Have you lived swathes of your life in autopilot mode?
Do you know what made you come to your senses and back to life?
Have you tried any of these techniques, or others, to get back into the here and now? Which are you favourite?
Would you like to explore why you’re choosing autopilot mode? I’m here to help!